There is no comparison to look at here.  Men are clearly from another planet, and Mars sounds about right.  I'm just trying to figure out when the ship is coming back to pick them up and drop off a new batch.  Let me start off with my disclaimer.  Yes, I know not all men are walking around portraying themselves as humans, while being 100% alien.  

Now that I have gotten that out of the way, I along with several of my female counterparts all across the world would like to know, what's the deal?  Why has dating become so hard?  Why are men so closed off when it comes to expressing themselves emotionally?  And why is it necessary to play mind games when it's so easy to simply be honest.  So many questions, and I'm not sure I have all the answers.

If you have ever sat down with your elders and listened to their stories of courtship, love, and commitment it is quite understandable to feel a need to achieve this level of undeniable love before you reach your golden years.  Or perhaps, you have watched one too many love stories and allowed an unhealthy obsession with the made-up theories of love to shadow what love should actually be, feel, sound, and taste like.  Yep, with love, everything tastes better.  Can't find this seasoning in any store though.  Bummer huh?!

The year is flying by!  Although we are still enjoying what is left of the summer months, fall is quickly approaching.  If you blink twice it will all become a blur and your mind will begin to wonder why it all went by so fast.  Preparations have begun to return the children to school, either virtually or from the comforts of home, it's familiar normalcy that strangely enough feels fantastic.  It's what you know.  Also known as the 'same ole same'.  The day-to-day routines become so insanely repetitive you could easily do it all with your eyes closed while juggling a multitude of responsibilities.  Is that really a good thing?  Well, honestly, it depends on which day you ask that loaded question.

As comforting as your routine has become, there is something that doesn't feel quite right.  It's typically during the quiet times when you can sit back and exhale that you realize it has been far too long since you and your significant other have truly taken time to enjoy one another.  The morning meet-ups in the shower, the warm kisses before you both leave to start your day and the ever so gentle (or not) squeezes that make you bite your lip and prep for what is to come later.  The mid-day texts telling you how beautiful you looked even when you know your hair was a whole entire hot mess.  The sweet and sexy voice messages you left him while he was in a meeting.  Yeah, all of that and then some.  Where did it all go and how do you find it again?   Let's see if we can find out!

If this title confused you, then hold onto your bootstraps, purse straps, jockstraps, and whatever type of strap you can find because it's about to be a bumpy ride!  The art of dating is quite arguably one of thee most exhausting journeys I have ever been on.  If I had to describe it, I would say it feels like a full-time job with no benefits or weekends off.  A never-ending cycle of great beginnings that ultimately turn into broken promises, goofy behavior, silly unexplained emojis, and emotions that are left on the table.  Oh boy, this is super fun, said no one ever!  Grab a glass of wine, get comfy, this is about to get real interesting!  Who am I kidding, just bring the bottle because you are going to need it!
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It’s been a normal weekend like any other.  Early morning google searches with one eye open, mild contemplation about devising a get rich in 30 days plan, a hunger in the pit of my stomach so strong I fear I will buy pointless things when I make my grocery store run, and a permanent fixation on finding the perfect bouquet of fresh flowers.  I should point out that I buy fresh flowers often, so this is not just because it’s a national day of love.  I should also point out that I told a couple of friends I was purchasing a bouquet for myself because it’s a national day of love.  Hey, I could change up at any moment, but that’s not the point.

As I enter the store it is as if Valentine's Day has exploded and the reminders that I am single are flashing before me like a neon sign at a late-night massage parlor.  You simply cannot miss it!

There are flowers by the grapes, a few bouquets by the spaghetti squash, and an entire sea of flowers by the mixed nuts.  Interpret that in whichever way you like.  As I approach the beautiful assortment of flowers, I see the perfect bouquet I must have.  Having left my glasses at home I can’t tell if that is a $5 sign or if there is a 5 followed by another number and two trailing zeros.  As my vision zones in, I yell through my mask, '$59 for that!  Are you kidding me???'  The lady behind the flower counter in the perkiest voice,  ‘Hi, how are you today?!’  It’s as if she knows I am the masked bargain shopper who scrambles through the discounted, yet older seasoned flowers every other Saturday.  Today is no exception, I'll return on Monday when the prices have returned to the normal single person rate.  

​It's no surprise that this day is not a favorite for many while for some it's the day they wait for every year.  I've been both, however, the more I learned the true meaning of love, the more I realized how hopeless of a romantic I really am.  Sometimes all we need is love to remind us just how amazing it is.  It feels good to see people embark on new beginnings, find love, make great memories, and enjoy genuine happiness.  I'm not mad at the process in the least bit.  

Love is a universal language that we all speak in our own unique ways.  You don't have to wait for Valentine's Day to show your love and affection to family, friends, or that special someone but it's fun, terribly cute and a few flowers never hurt anyone.  Be creative and do something special for him/her, put on your favorite dress, spray on the cologne that makes her go crazy, and just let go and let something different in for a change.  Life is fleeting, find something worth living for and do that, repeatedly.   

Have you ever noticed that nearly every situation and encounter, you are asked about your relationship status or lack thereof?  Visiting the doctor, catching up with friends, applying for a loan, adopting a pet, shoe shopping, and pretty much any situation you can think of or exaggerate about.  Trust me when I say the list is never ending and it only seems to grow as we get older. 

Maybe for some the end goal is not necessarily to find a soulmate, but to find their version of happy with someone who makes them smile at least 3 times a week and asks them how their day was.  It is perfectly fine to want something different than the status quo.  Commercials, ads, songs, movies, society, friends and even family push standards, trends, and beliefs our way without knowing what we truly need, and without realizing it we begin to accept all of those things and embrace and seek what others say we 'should' be looking for and ultimately lose a bit of ourselves in the process.
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