Make no mistake about it, every single person on the face of this planet has an opinion and most aren't afraid to voice it, be ostracized because of it, unfriended at the tone of it, or simply looked at as weird, unforgiving and downright rude because you expressed it. Speaking up and owning your voice is a cocky move and you should be prepared for those who just don't and will never get it. So, make sure your skin is thick and your sensitivity meter is turned all the way down, past zero.
What makes a person feel bold enough to say exactly what's on their mind without thinking twice? Some are born this way, with aggression and fierceness so powerful that everyone not only sits up and listens, but they dare not say anything against what you have just proclaimed as the truth. Some are a little meek and take their time finding their true voice, but once they arrive it's like new energy has been lifted and those in the path better take cover, and quick! I hope you're ready because this level of awesomeness is not for everyone.
As a fumbling symbol of courtesy, we sometimes find that we have muted ourselves when we should have been shouting. Maybe because we thought our choice of words would have hurt someone's feelings, or we felt a need to belong, and being different seemed too much like going against the grain. Ever brushed your hair with your hand in the opposite direction? Well if you haven't, try it now. Go ahead, try it, I'll wait... Feels weird right? Going against the grain doesn't feel good initially until you realize it's actually quite soothing. Takes time to realize most things, there is no exception here. I decided to take a poll to see what the majority has to say. Vote below and let me know which one best describes you.
Who is your favorite singer?
Did you find it hard to choose because all the above is an accurate description of you? If you answered yes to that then congratulations, you are human! The fact of the matter is, most of us have had one if not all of these feelings at some point in time during our lives. It doesn't mean you are lacking in your ability to be a level of sarcastic that memes are made of, it just means it is what it is.
Over the past 5 years, I feel as if I have been on a sorry, not sorry tour. I am not going out of my way to let you know I couldn't care less what you think of my actions or words, but I'm also not going out of my way to make sure you do care. If you know anything about me, you are aware that I was always shy and quiet growing up. I didn't speak up, I was often afraid to from the fear of either sounding stupid or misunderstood. Those feelings carried me through my adolescent, and young adult years. I now realize the struggle to get out of my own head and into my true feelings was a bit rough because I wish I'd found this magical voice years ago. Hindsight is 2020. No pun intended. I'm a believer in things happening in their perfect due time, so I won't complain. Time is also one of the best teachers, you learn a lot if you pay attention and listen to the lessons along the way.
In the middle of a conversation, have you ever been so heated and disgruntled that your opinion and choice of words was delivered all wrong? You end up leaving the situation feeling defeated, angry and bitter. There is a balancing act that must be kept in mind when, and if you are ready to own this badge, and three rules that will leave you feeling victorious. Rule #1: Leave anger out of it, no one is going to listen to someone who is yelling at the top of their lungs, your point will never reach the target. Rule #2: Respect others opinions. Not everyone is going to agree with how you feel, what you did, why you said what you said, or how you express yourself. Rule #3: This is most important. Say what you mean, and mean what you say, don't waiver. If you believe in it, speak it! Own your voice and let it be heard without apology.
Sorry not sorry has a passive-aggressive flair to it, but it's also a respectful way of saying hey I like you, but I do not care what you think. Simply hilarious, yet so true. So, keep in mind, if you hear this, don't be offended, instead, be honored that someone cared enough to sarcastically and nicely address the situation. When it's all said and done, there is no obligation to be anything or anyone you are not comfortable with or ready for. When the time comes, you will feel it and know without a shadow of a doubt.
AJ writes & blogs from her home in Atlanta, GA. You can also find her work as a contributing writer at www.groovmagazine.com
"This is how you do it; you sit down at the keyboard and you put one word after another until it's done. It's that easy, and that hard." -Neil Gaiman