Prior to the beginning of the new year, I can't say with any true certainty that I vowed to see my resolutions come true. The reason being, I hadn't made any. Duh! As a planner and a bit of a perfectionist along with acknowledging my OCD about everything from the crookedness of the kitchen rug to the slant of the window curtain, I have accepted that things just are as they are meant to be and I am perfectly fine with those minor imperfections and this run-on sentence.
Aside from being totally against resolutions this year, I planned to dive into my writing, get lost into the creativity of my keyboard. The sounds under my fingertips that mean I am working, the clickety-clack of my nails that would annoy some sounds like a perfectly tuned melody to me. I am thinking, creating, and sharing my thoughts with the world and that allows me to dive headfirst into my happy space. Life is forever unexpected in the series of events that are waiting for you around the corner. You simply never know what to expect. Those events will sometimes cause a necessary pause, allowing time to completely heal and get back to who you are. The beginning of my year has been a challenge, but I'm here, still standing and stronger than ever. Mental health is real and necessary to acknowledge. I have a goal to create a few new posts per month, however, as a creator, I have learned that pushing myself is not the proper way in order to create authentic work, which is what my brand is all about. When the spirit moves me I will write and when the universe grabs hold of me and tells me to woosah for just a bit I shall listen. I feel rejuvenated and refreshed. Restoring AJ was a promise I made to myself. Told myself it was ok and perfectly normal to take that much-needed break. The gift of writing doesn't fade when it's genuine. Feels good to be back doing what I love. As mental health awareness is heightened please take the time to ensure you are ok. Talk to those who will listen and find things you can submerge yourself into without overwhelming yourself all over again. Or just do absolutely nothing, sometimes that serves as the medicine your body truly needs. One of my favorite quotes is, "It's not rocket science so it's not that hard unless you are a rocket scientist and think it's super easy". Yes, I made that up, but it makes sense! With all the love and positive vibes I can muster, I wish you all the best that life has in store for you. ~AJ 💫
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With a stretch and yawn as if I had just completed an Olympic-themed hibernation event I woke to a new day and a brand spanking new year! I don't feel any different. I'm not magically better at any one thing than I was on yesterday. I slept for most of the New Year's Eve festivities and it truly felt perfectly normal for a change. There is a small bit of jealously watching those who had a blowout party and danced the night away. Then I am reminded of the times when I woke on the 1st day of the new year with a rocking hangover so that less than 1 percent of jealousy I mentioned earlier has quickly diminished into nothingness. Besides, I am 49 and have no time for regrets and sideways ginger ale sips from the sofa all day.
I love new beginnings. I always have. The start of a new movie, a fresh new pair of boots, a crisp bag of chips just opened to a perfect level of freshness, and of course seeing the Amazon delivery truck outside my house, yet again. If 50 First Dates was a person waiting for that blue truck to hang a right at the corner and stop in front of my house, it'd most certainly be me. It's all in what moves you. I'm pretty simple on most days. I require normal things and try to give as much as I receive. As a writer whose mind is wildly teetering between sanity vs insanity, I believe I have finally found my balance. Writing gives me the freedom to escape from the reality of life when I choose and for that gift, I am forever thankful. Reading through Happy New Year texts and social media posts this morning with one eye open while searching for my reading glasses makes my heart feel happy. After the past couple of years, it's no surprise that we all want what feels like normal. What tastes like fantasy and what makes you dream like you did when you allowed your thoughts to run completely free. So how do we get back to all of that? It's simple, you gotta allow yourself to. Let go of what you feel you shouldn't be doing just because someone told you it was silly or because you are afraid of all of the great things that might happen. One foot in front of the other is how I plan to step through life. It isn't always rose petals perfectly laid, one because my cats would never allow me to be that great, but it is Chapter One and you can write it, however, your heart desires. Go on an adventure and amaze yourself with what is waiting for you. The deeper question here is, how much longer do I have to wish everyone I encounter a Happy New Year?! My cutoff is somewhere between the end of today or February 1st. Hey, what can I say I'm a sucker for giving well wishes. With love, light, and an overflow of blessings, I am wishing you the best that 2022 has to offer. Sending you positive vibes and teleporting catchy beats you won't be able to erase from your memory no matter how many tequila shots you have. ~AJ 🎊 I live for the weekends and everything that comes along with it. Mainly the joy that I get to say bye to work for a couple of days is enough to get me going. It's more than that, the feeling of my warm bed that begs me to lay in for just a bit and the sound of nothingness if just for a little while. The perfect opportunity for me to clear my head and plan my day. What might start as a lazy day in my dreams never ends up that way. I'm a busy body by nature and there is nothing I can do to change that. I'm either cleaning as if my life depended on it or taping off yet another wall to start painting. Well, I didn't get around to painting just yet but I did do a pretty awesome job of cleaning if I say so myself. Just to give you an idea, here is a mini breakdown of why my weekend was probably better than yours.
It's a brand new month, so what are you going to do with it? There is something about a new month that feels wonderful. The previous month is a thing of the past, so out with the old and in with the new. With an air of excitability, sprinkled with a dash of unknown happenings, it's like watching a really good movie unfold. You have no idea what is going to happen next but you are in for the long haul and patiently wait to see how it all plays out. It's not just any month either, it's the last month of the year to be exact. No pressure to finally finish all of those resolutions you planned 11 months ago while downing your 4th or 5th glass of bubbly. But I'm not counting, so by all means, do you! Chances are you don't even remember what you said. If the pressure of living up to your resolution promise is too much to bare you can always chuck those promises right out the window and simply say fuck it. Just for the record I typically do not use profanity on my website, but then I realized one thing. Keyword being 'my', so... I'm into lots of things. Shopping, decorating, opening a nice bottle of champagne, playing in the dirt to give my green thumb a bit of exercise, and of course one of my favorites of all time, writing. A new diet, a revised business plan, or maybe even saving money to take that amazing vacation you have been dreaming of are all things worth being excited about. Giving yourself a much-needed reset is important so don't be afraid to jump in and give it all you got! Of course, this month comes along with holiday celebrations, fun times with family, friends or that special someone. A little perfectly placed mistletoe ain't never hurt nobody, so dust off those plans and make some magic happen!
With as many feel-good vibes as the soul can take, a friendly reminder is to simply enjoy it all no matter what day it is. Plan ahead and set yourself up for ways to enjoy this month instead of working yourself into a frenzy. Time is just as important as anything else, plan accordingly, and thank me later. In closing... Hello December, I've been waiting for you. ~AJ 🍾 It wasn't love at first sight. More reminiscent of feelings like regret, disappointment, and betrayal. You know, similar to finding out you have just been catfished by the person you thought was your dream come true, only to find that it's a Nightmare on Elm Street. Hi ma'am, what is your reason for returning this item? Please check all boxes that apply. Is there a box that says, because I just don't want it and I would like a do-over?! Ughhh, didn't think so... How could I get myself into this type of quandary and how in the world do I get out of it? If I could I would escape into a black hole back to the real world, because clearly, this is straight out of the Matrix.
The deed was done, the documents signed, the handshakes shaken and it was officially the season of no turning back. 'Ok, deal with it,' I told myself, and get into this vibe cause baby it's full steam ahead now. As I woke this morning I knew what my day would consist of. An early morning workout, using this amazing facial cleanser I bought, and a nice sensible breakfast. At some point, I know that I will need to do a bit of yard work and I'm perfectly fine with that as long as my music accompanies me during the grueling task of raking leaves. Oh, and I have to work today, but that's not as exciting as anything else I described so let me continue. I quite like the beginning of a new week. It gives me a sense of discipline that I may have lost mid-week or perhaps during the weekend. Re-focusing my energy on anything positive and uplifting, as always. Things like planning my workout regimen, ensuring I follow a healthy diet, or refraining from shopping, at least for a few days. Or not! I believe in balance. If I want it you can guarantee I'm going to have it and the rules I have preset for myself are suddenly floating out the window. The art of deprivation only applies when I'm getting close to vacation time and my two-piece bikini is saying, 'girl put down that 6th slice of pizza!' Motivation comes in many forms. A friend who is uplifting, a book that redefines the art of strength, perseverance, and resilience, or perhaps a movie about getting knocked down over and over again, yet learning to stand strong and tall ten times over. I accept it and receive it all. "O, Sunshine! The most precious gold to be found on earth." -ROMAN PAYNEI saw the sunshine through the blinds this morning and a smile grew across my face. The light that gives me so much life and makes me feel like anything is possible. Watching the squirrels chase each other in the yard as if they have not a care in the world. Or maybe they are in a rush to gather all the necessities for hibernation in preparation for the coming winter months. With so much going on around me, I'm alert and aware of how it all makes me feel. The more I give in to the vibe of creativity and all that inspires me the more I find the joy of simplicity. The beauty in peace, and the art of continuing to find my own kind of balance. Be inspired... ~AJ 🌞 So, I have these notions to jump into projects around the house. It's in my nature and I cannot stop the thoughts once they enter any portion of my brain. On Friday, I decided it was time to get into the backyard and spruce it up a bit. What started as a small project in my mind turned into a full-on outdoor fresh event. If you have ever done any form of yard work then you realize outdoor fresh is nothing nice. 😷 Day 1: Pulled weeds. Cleared my area and started putting down my border. My sister cut down weeds growing through my fence while my brother cleaned my gutters. A true family affair. As the sun continued to blaze down on me I felt even more determined to get it done. My progress seemed to be light considering I had been outside for 8 hours straight. At the end of day 1, I counted no less than 15 mosquito bites. Oh, this is going to be so much fun said no one ever! Day 2: The weed pulling frenzy continues and my vision is crystal clear. I know exactly what I want to do and just how I want it to look. The only problem, I need to return to Home Depot and Lowes for more stuff. As if digging in the dirt was not enough I'll just grill as well because who doesn't like to feel completely exhausted by the end of the day. 🙄 Determined to tackle the glorious pile of sticks the previous owners left for me I had choice words for them that I am sure are illegal somewhere. Mom says it must have been a fire pit. In the pile, I found a single sock, a hot wheels car, and an old screen. My idea of a beautiful and serene fire pit is a bit different, so please stay tuned. The more I pulled and cleared, the better it started to look. And then Sammie the Snake appears. I run and scream for my whole entire life and retreat to the safety of my deck. My blood-curdling scream should have cleared any rodent, critter, or insect within a 20-mile radius, so I returned to finish what I started. While my family thought I was certifiably insane for wearing boots in close to 90-degree weather, my handy dandy outdoor, weed pulling, yard boots were right on time. Not letting a silly slinky snake stop my flow so back to it I go. About 5 1/2 hours later. Many breaks and stops in between I finished one side of my project, which by the way I absolutely love. While there are mosquito bites covering most of my body, I can stand outside and admire my work while scratching the skin off of my limbs, but hey, it was all worth it.
The best thing I found of the previous owners was a small piece of white chalk. I wasn't quite sure if that's what it was at first. Quick sniff test and it was confirmed. Hey, don't judge me. I already had it in my hand so the damage was potentially done. It made me smile and brought back the kid in me. Proof of that is in the first pic above. Nothing but love and blessings as I enter into home ownership chronicles...day 71. 🏡 ~AJ Here I go again. My absolute favorite day of the week! I literally bounce out of bed with an extra pep in my step. I sing a few lyrics of a song I made up in my head and talk to my kitties while they stare at me the same as they do every single morning. A bit of Groundhog Day vibes but I'm not really complaining because today is 'that' day! The day that puts an end to the boring mundane repetitive tasks that haunt me Monday through Friday. I work a 9-5 all week so it's the glorious beginning to the end of the same ole same, the thought of possibilities for the weekend, the planned get-togethers with friends or the idea of doing absolutely nothing. If I have ever told you I didn't plan my weekends, just know I was lying. Kinda in the category of little white lies so please don't hold it against me. My plans for this weekend ahead include a bit of yard work, firing up the grill, and family time. I also have a room to paint, a library to get together, and a few boxes to unpack. However, if I do too much I will find myself knocking on Sunday evening's door and mad at myself for not getting in enough woosah time. I've had this on and off again love affair with Friday since the last time I claimed it was the one and true love of my life. We just go together so well, no talking back, and consistently giving me exactly what I need. It's that type of energy I long for each and every day. I've said that any day can feel this way, but I would be lying to myself and to all of you so I refuse to fill you with those tall tales. I can't help but wonder why every day can't be Friday. From now until the end of Neveruary I will always and forever be living for this day. The thought of sleeping in during the weekend sounds very appealing, however, I just can't seem to do it. I feel as if I am missing out on something so up I rise at the crack of dawn when half of the world is fast asleep. And what if the plans I made never happen and something better comes along? Sounds like a good weekend ahead, simple as hot buttered toast with a side of crispy bacon accompanied by a cup of hot black coffee on a Sunday morning. Which reminds me to add all of that to my grocery list. But hey, feel free to check in with me on Monday and I'll let you know if any of what I planned actually happened.
The older I grow the more important it has become to make the time count. Filling my days with things, people, and experiences that make my soul happy. As the years continue to go by I will continue to be thankful for this day because it's quite simply my favorite of them all. ~AJ The time is just past 6 a.m. As I scroll through the internet with one eye open while the other adjusts, my current obsession is finding the perfectly scented hand soap for my master bathroom. Why, because I'm a huge scent freak and googling weird things at odd hours is simply what I do. My mind never stops, the wheels in my brain turn faster than a hamster chasing his long-lost love on a never ending wheel of doom.
My days have been running together in no proper fashion for the past six months. A full on collision of mayhem and boxes. The two go together like popcorn and fried eggs. And yet there is someone somewhere eating that very weird combination as I type this. I've had quite the adventure with my new home and decided to summarize things in chronological order for my friends on Facebook. Today I will share my story here, with all of you to raise an eyebrow at me, call me crazy, laugh with me, or at me. At the end of my story, if for any reason you feel sorry for me, yes I will accept your generous donations. 😇 We all know there are certain things best served in moderation, maybe small doses, and perhaps not at all. However, we indulge anyway. Determined to believe if no one sees you that it really doesn't count as a 'bad thing'. Taking it a step further by convincing yourself that it won't hurt if it's just this one time. The problem with that theory is, once is typically never enough, especially if it feels good while you are doing it. There are daily reminders all around us of the things we shouldn't say, do, or feel, so I dare not bore you with any more of that. I am here to remind you of all the good things and just how wonderfully splendid and magical they are. 1. Singing in the shower |
AuthorAJ is a creative writer and storyteller writing from her home in Indiana. Archives
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"This is how you do it; you sit down at the keyboard and you put one word after another until it's done. It's that easy, and that hard." -Neil Gaiman
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